I awoke this morning (ok, it was 3pm, but you get my drift) to an article on Yahoo stating that Ricky Martin has decided to come “out of the closet” after all these years and announce that he is gay.
I wasn’t sure if it was just me, or if perhaps I was jumping the gun years ago when I first saw his “She bangs” video…but I thought he was gay ALREADY. How is this a new development..? Granted, we could discuss the accuracy of my “gay-dar” for hours, seeing as I’m not homosexual, or lesbian, or bisexual (for those of you not hip to the hip talk, “gay-dar” is “gay radar”). For that matter, we could discuss the accuracy of a homosexual’s “gay-dar” as well, as I’m sure even THEY are wrong sometimes. Hell, while we’re at it, we could digress altogether and discuss the stereotypical assumptions of humanity as a whole, and question why anyone even HAS a “gay-dar” in the first place…accurate or not. That’s not what I came to talk about today however…because I don’t want to be here all day writing just as I’m sure you don’t want to be here all day reading.
What I DID come to do today was ask a simple question: “Does anybody really care..?”
I understand that as humans, we generally like to know what’s going on in the world…especially in the case of celebrities. People like to be up on their gossip. They like to have information on certain subject matter because it gives them the upper hand in conversation. As soon as you heard that Michael Jackson died, you felt the need to tell someone immediately. But no one wanted to be the first person to HEAR that Michael Jackson had died.
What I don’t understand however, is why someone being homosexual/lesbian/bisexual is STILL news..??
It’s 2010 for crying outloud! A woman won the Academy Award for directing for the first time in history. Our President signed a law finalizing health care which could change all of our lives significantly. Earthquakes are killing people by the hundreds of thousands. Our natural resources are depleting every single minute of the day. Our economy is garbage…not trash…GARBAGE.
…and Ricky Martin being gay when I already thought he WAS gay is the first thing I read about when I wake up?
I was halfway through the process of calling a few gay friends of mine and asking them: “Why would homosexuals even feel the need to stay IN the closet? Why not just tell everyone the moment you find out? Why not just live your life normally regardless of what other people think of you?”
I mean, I don’t go around all day telling people that I’m a heterosexual. I don’t make announcements to the general public that I’m a Christian. I don’t hold press conferences in the wee hours of the morning to tell the world that I’m a mulatto.
So why hide ANYTHING..?
Then it occurred to me…it’s not gays that are afraid to come out of the closet. It’s the U.S. as a whole that is afraid to accept the fact that there even IS a closet.
Seriously America, do we really still care about an individual’s sexual practices?
So your male neighbor sleeps with men. Who cares? How does that affect your day to day activities? So you know a girl that sleeps with girls. So what? Are they having sex with one another on your lawn? On your couch? IN YOUR BED? Can you hear the Elton John music blaring through the walls of their apartment? You can’t..?
So what do you CARE?
Haven’t we, a nation BUILT on maintaining ones rights, religions and beliefs…surpassed this way of thinking? Can’t we, a veritable melting pot of nationalities, thought processes and dirty secrets, just keep our mouths shut and ACCEPT that we can’t control who other people have sex with??
I can’t say this for sure (as I have no idea what the exact statistics are), but if I had to guess I’d say that the U.S. is the leader in cursing, fornication, porn, theft, larceny, erotic asphyxiation, abortions, rapes, murders, envelope-pushing television, porn, and “Skin-amax”.
Maybe we could get over a few folks’ desire to sleep with the same sex…no?
Or maybe I should just get my “gay-dar” checked…
– F
Fidel Everywhere 
First, I want to make one point: America (urban America especially) is not part of the 80 countries in the world where it is illegal and punishable to be gay, let alone have human rights. To live as one who understands the kind of persecution gays experience, makes it important to have some balls and represent. Not long ago, America was included in the company of these remaining 80 countries until some people decided to let people know we do have a highly valued integrity macho ego,religious hypocrite, perverted oppressor types who have a dumb preoccupation of those with a particular presuasion with being somehow fucked up, evil, disgusting, un-natural, or worthy of torture and death, not to mention that gay men in particular are suddenly feminized (which is culturally ingrained as being weak). That is one reason why it DOES matter to come out. Coming out is essentially taking responsibilty and taking action aimed at ppl who do indeed have such warped, segregated misconceptions of some people who do not have the same sexual persuasion. Being ‘gay’ is not solely about sex. And the constant stereotypical barrage of unfunny jokes about us people and our weirdness can be a completely alienating experience most ppl do not really get. So as a matter of self respect, one can say really itsnoone’s business and no one is owed any explanation that would over shadow me and suddenly make catagorizations according to other’s perceptions and judgements for that matter.
And at the same time, any person, artist’s inparticular, do not owe any ‘confession’ or explanation about who they like, especially when part of their job of playing someone’s fantasy or creating something interpretive, when the unintelligible, boring, idiotic, and homophobic crap other ppl harbor becomes their burden to bare. We do not want that shit, frankly. And when powerful government officials make statements that “babies are better off dead than be adopted by “gay” couples” it can be enough to finally take a stand, ala Ricky Martin.
So, one may not care about someone being gay, and you might have “known” it, but an onslaught of fucked up people can make one’s life whose career is very public,very unpleasant and difficult. So while I appreciate that you embrace those who take their time becoming an extremely brave and honest person than most men who ostracize them in return, also give them some credit
for being whoever the fuck they want to be and making it either no one’s or everyone’s knowledge, because it is not a novelty. There are legitimate reason’s why we should care…AND support. And forget Biblical references, because even if you are going to go there (which I wouldn’t), there are hundereds more admonitions against hetero sex than gay. Yes, that is not a misconstrued fact, I read it front to back. And Jesus didn’t mention it. Not once. And it is not a commandment. But the subject is relevant because while we are a strangley puritan country, we are just as much dualistically hypocritical. But I blame it on the dumbing of intelligence and reason as well. So yes, what is more imprtant is: “Why DO people care?”…Seriously.
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nice post, Fidel. I agree with Stephanie in that people have erected large walls of judgment that they hide behind and which provide them with privilege. For some it’s sexual orientation. For others it’s religion. They feel that if they can use their wall to negate someone’s narrative, then their slice of the pie is bigger and they can repress the inner fear that they’re just like like that gay person or that muslim – considered a freak by somebody…somewhere.
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Oh how nice it would be if no one cared. Unfortunately there are people who have still not moved past it and realized there are more important things to know about a person…like they’re character….and capacity to love…ok…got a bit corney (is it corny or corney?)…but you get my point 🙂
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